Teach People How to Treat You

In both professional and personal relationships, many issues are avoidable if you teach people how to treat you. Think about when you meet someone new. You can learn plenty about them and the way they hope to embark on a relationship by verbal and non-verbal cues. Do they give you a wave at a distance when being introduced or do they hug you at first greeting? Do they smile and act casual or give a sense of formality and rigidity? They are inadvertently teaching you how they want to be interacted with. You can do this, too!

Personal Teaching

If you hope to build a friendship that is meaningful, behave in meaningful ways. Discuss topics of greater depth and demonstrate a level of vulnerability you are comfortable with. Do you crave friendships that are low drama and don’t require instant replies? You can say this! Recently a friend was concerned that she missed an important date by a few days and was down on herself for being “a bad friend.” This couldn’t have been further from the truth. After reassuring her that friendship quality is not based on such a detail for me, it was much easier to return to a simple, guilt-free conversation. No stress was felt on my end and no stress was needed on hers.

Workplace Teaching

Teaching can also be very valuable for work interactions. Want to avoid late night texts or weekend emails with action items? First, be sure you don’t send them. If you need to communicate something in real time as an exception, explain that it is the exception and otherwise such conversations can be reserved for work hours. Likewise, if your job duty does not require constant monitoring, do not self-elect to monitor/respond during off hours. Coworkers will learn that responses are timely when appropriate and otherwise will be tabled until a more suitable time.

If you’ve already fallen into a relationship without ideal conventions, consider life coaching to help troubleshoot and transform these into improved relationships to benefit both parties.