Enjoy Failing Spectacularly

You’ve been invited out with a group of not-so-close friends and you RSVP yes, excited for a chance to grow your social circle. Days before you get notice the activity will be karaoke. Oh. No. You only grace the shower and the steering wheel with those sweet melodies. Is it too late to cancel? After all, you’re not going to make friends through aural assault.

But what is the draw of karaoke? Of course, seeing someone with absolute talent crush a song is goose bump-evoking bliss. But how fun is watching someone who is having an absolute blast regardless of skill? Isn’t is better to go in wholeheartedly and enjoy the moment versus let the imperfections spoil the enjoyment? Perfection is a friend of no one. As Randy Pausch, known for his Last Lecture at Carnegie Mellon and his book The Last Lecture, astutely said: “Better to fail spectacularly than do something mediocre.”

“Better to fail spectacularly than do something mediocre.”

Randy Pausch

Practice failing spectacularly and being ok with the outcome

Let’s take a moment to agree that we are not expected to do all things well. Some people are amazing chefs, musicians, athletes, speakers, educators, partners, or artists. Few are amazing at all of these. So why do we put this internal pressure on ourselves when logically we know it should not be expected by others or, more importantly, by ourselves? Dance! Get out there and have a good time. Cook! Maybe the dog gets the “dinner special” and you order out as backup. Enjoy the trying and the new expectation of “trying is victory enough.”

For recovering perfectionists, try small, intentional doses of failure to work on your tolerance to par or subpar performance. Can you muster drawing at home despite feeling like an artistic imposter? Make a version of a knit sweater that will never be confused for store bought? Attend karaoke night and at least go up as part of a group? As we realize that we will outlive an imperfect experience, we begin to enjoy failing spectacularly. We can also enjoy the eased internal pressures.

How failing spectacularly may surprise you

Fear of performance–like public speaking anxiety—holds us back in many tangible and intangible ways. If you are worried your business venture won’t be a success, you might opt to skip trying rather than suffer the public shame of failure. You then lose the lessons learned from this life experience like how to properly research or prepare. How to execute and promote. How to manage stressors that are anticipated and unanticipated. You miss all the shots you don’t take. Being ok with a miss, even an air ball here and there, promotes growth and new experience.

How have you failed spectacularly in the past? What did you gain from it? Drop a comment below.